For several days in a row, and hours on end, I’ve stared at my computer or fiddled at my desk wondering how the words would come & what to put down. I considered a blogging break after Write 31 Days, but I have work to do. Like an overdue newsletter for Rise Up Writers and the blog ideas & book proposals which continually swirl around my mind.
So, I show up to the computer, but struggle to make the kind of progress I want. Then I remember it’s OK.
God’s got this. Just keep showing up.
At times like this, words stick on my insides. They don’t always come loose, but I keep coming to the place where they’ll go if and when they do.
Honestly, I fight giving up & giving in to the void of doing nothing rather than pursuing the hope & faith I speak of. Because it seems easier, but deep down I know it’s not. Instead, I’m choosing to show up.
Showing up provides room for opportunity. Showing up keeps momentum going, even when it seems nothing is accomplished.
Showing up means choosing to not stay down, beaten up with hurt, worry, or fear.
Showing up doesn’t necessarily mean getting it all done, but being available & receiving what’s offered for that day, even when the task list gets put away.
You see, circumstances knocked me down again last week. Fight-or-flight kicked in and it takes awhile for the brain to settle down to normal. To think through the fog.
This kind of fog says, take it easy. Wait a spell.
Eventually, the sun always breaks through.
Y’all, I don’t know much of how to convey this journey of faith except for the way I’ve taken it myself & the way He leads me still.
Awkwardly. Boldly.
Fearfully. Faithfully.
With gusto. With trembling.
By falling down & rising up. Again and again.
Living by faith altogether clumsily down an imperfect road, while finding beauty out of brokenness. The more broken I am the more beauty I see. And God’s allowed me to break much.
Every day brings its own challenges. Every day requires us to seek Him over what we think we know and what we see before us.
Every day we’re given the gift of choosing.
Some days, it’s all we can do to choose showing up. But, somehow, something amazing happens when we do.
Before you know it, one small step of faith after another adds up to one well-traveled road. By showing up we find ourselves in a number of new & exciting places. You never know when the beauty & breakthrough you’re waiting for is just around the corner.
Sometimes, showing up is hard though.
Sometimes showing up means getting out of bed when you can’t think of one good reason why you should.
Sometimes showing up means looking for some glimpse of Him even though you’re beginning to think He’s left & never going to return. Yet, He promises He is there & we will find Him when we seek Him with our whole heart.
Showing up means not giving in to defeat. Because somehow you know there is the possibility of victory & deep down you really want believe that He is greater & bigger than any challenge faced yesterday, today or tomorrow.
Because He is. He really, really is.
We are given the gift of choice. You and me. We can’t choose it for others, but we can choose it for ourselves. How about we choose together? How about we believe better together?
We’ll choose to pursue hope & faith beyond the circumstances of today.
We’ll choose to keep showing up when the way is unclear and there seems to be no way through.
We’ll choose to keep showing up even when the way through is painful & rocky.
We’ll keep showing up when faith feels weak & hard to do.
Sometimes showing up simply means looking up.
Jolene, this reminds me of my sermon this weekend. The text was Elijah at Mt Carmel and the prophets of Baal. They all were given a choice but the ultimate truth is that God is the one true king. And God always always chooses us too!
I love that story. Such an amazing testimony to trusting in our mighty, powerful God among outright hatred & vile word slinging. Even more powerful is the way God showed up & His glory was made known. Amen, Tara!
(1)Faith isn’t always a leap. Mostly it’s one small step after another, with lots of falling down and getting back up in between.
(2)When my kids were about age two, I started teaching them “Choices have consequences”. Camus said “Life is the sum of our choices.” My version is “The choices we make dictate the lives we lead.”
What does the Lord require of us? Do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with our God. Oh, and keep showing up.
I love the way you put that Laurie. 🙂
So needed this today. I’ve been feeling similarly since #Write31Days. I have taken a break, but I know God is telling me to get back in there, despite my lack of faith.
I hear ya’. Father, we come together seeking YOUR will for the times when we need to rest & put writing aside and recognizing when we need to push through because you have something to do in and through us. Show your presence to Faith this week in a special way that ministers to her heart right where she needs it. Thank you that we can pray for each other.